The Perception Principle
By. Steven Furtick
There’s a secret to listening to sermons that dramatically affects what you will get from them. I call it the perception principle.
I’ve preached about this before and share it with our staff regularly, but I’ve never blogged about it. I want to give it to you because I believe it will revolutionize the way you listen to sermons and exponentially increase their impact on you.
The perception principle goes like this:
I can only receive someone on the level that I perceive them.
This is true for God, and for every human relationship you have. The way you choose to see someone determines how you will treat them and how you will receive whatever they have to give you.
Negatively, this means that if you perceive your wife to be a nag, that’s the way she’s always going to sound to you. Even when she really isn’t being one. If you perceive your husband to be a loser, that’s how you’re going to receive him. No matter what he does.
Positively, it means that if you perceive someone to be wise, what they say will sound wise. And you’ll give it more weight. If you perceive someone to be ‘cool,’ everything they do will look cool.
Here’s how this matters when you’re listening to a sermon. How you perceive the person preaching will determine what you’re able to receive from them. And ultimately from God.
If all you see is a guy with good ideas and not a guy with a message from God, that’s all you’ll ever get. If you go into a sermon with an attitude of bless me if you can, you’re probably not going to be blessed. If you go in skeptical of every word, you’re probably going to find fault. And only find fault.
On the other hand, if you perceive your pastor to have a message for you from God, you’re probably going to be a lot more attentive and engaged. If you go into a sermon expecting to hear a word from God, you’re probably going to get one.
I’m convinced that what someone ‘gets’ from a sermon has nothing to do with the skill level of the person preaching. It’s how they perceive the person preaching. It’s how they decide to engage. When people tell me, ‘that’s the best I’ve ever heard you preach,’ I always want to respond: No, it’s the best you’ve ever listened.
I don’t care who your pastor is or who is preaching to you. Whether their podcast is downloaded by millions or their sermons are heard by five people, the principle is the same. Perceive them to have a message from God for you, and that’s what you’ll get.
Show up ready to hear from God, and don’t be surprised when you do.
Kamis, 08 September 2011
Rabu, 24 Agustus 2011
Frustasi karena pemimpin Anda ?
Kejengkelan akan dirasakan pemimpin yang baik pada posisi tengah, yang bekerja untuk pemimpin yang tidak effektif. Reaksi yang wajar untuk kefrustasian ini adalah memperbaiki atau mengganti orang yang menjadi atasan Anda. Tetapi hal itu biasanya bukan merupakan opsi bagi pemimpin pada posisi tengah. Bahkan sekiranya merupakan opsi, hal itu mungkin tidak tepat. Apapun keadaan kita, keterbatasan terbesar bukan pemimpin diatas kita - melainkan semangat didalam kita.
Apa yang perlu Anda lakukan ketika harus mengikuti seorang pemimpin yang tidak effektif ? Mungkin ini tidak mudah, tetapi Anda masih mungkin bertahan - bahkan mungkin berhasil - dalam situasi seperti ini. Inilah yang saya rekomendasikan ;
1. Kembangkan hubungan yang mantap dengan pemimpin Anda.
2. Identifikasikan dan hargai kekuatan pemimpin Anda.
3. Berkomitmenlah pada diri sendiri untuk menambah nilai kekuatan pemimpin Anda.
4. Mintalah izin untuk mengembangkan sebuah rencana permainan guna melengkapi kelemahan pemimpin Anda.
5. Tunjukan sumberdaya kepemimpinan yang baik pada pemimpin Anda.
Sungguh sulit memperbaiki aspek negatif untuk menambah nilai bagi pemimpin dan organisasi Anda, kecuali Anda tetap bertekun dalam jangka panjang. Pada waktunya nanti, orang akan mengakui bakat Anda. Yang lain akan mengakui kontribusi Anda. Mereka akan mengagumi kemampuan Anda untuk berhasil dan membantu orang lain - meskipun orang yang kurang berbakat dibanding Anda - menuju kesuksesan.
The 360 Leader - John Maxwell
Apa yang perlu Anda lakukan ketika harus mengikuti seorang pemimpin yang tidak effektif ? Mungkin ini tidak mudah, tetapi Anda masih mungkin bertahan - bahkan mungkin berhasil - dalam situasi seperti ini. Inilah yang saya rekomendasikan ;
1. Kembangkan hubungan yang mantap dengan pemimpin Anda.
2. Identifikasikan dan hargai kekuatan pemimpin Anda.
3. Berkomitmenlah pada diri sendiri untuk menambah nilai kekuatan pemimpin Anda.
4. Mintalah izin untuk mengembangkan sebuah rencana permainan guna melengkapi kelemahan pemimpin Anda.
5. Tunjukan sumberdaya kepemimpinan yang baik pada pemimpin Anda.
Sungguh sulit memperbaiki aspek negatif untuk menambah nilai bagi pemimpin dan organisasi Anda, kecuali Anda tetap bertekun dalam jangka panjang. Pada waktunya nanti, orang akan mengakui bakat Anda. Yang lain akan mengakui kontribusi Anda. Mereka akan mengagumi kemampuan Anda untuk berhasil dan membantu orang lain - meskipun orang yang kurang berbakat dibanding Anda - menuju kesuksesan.
The 360 Leader - John Maxwell
Sabtu, 06 Agustus 2011
Menemukan Pemimpin Potensial
Ada sesuatu yang lebih penting dan langka daripada kemampuan; yakni kemampuan mengenali kemampuan. Salah satu tanggung jawab utama seorang pemimpin yang berhasil adalah mengindentifikasi pemimpin potensial. Ini tidak selalu mudah, tetapi penting.
Dale Carnagie seorang pakar dalam hal mengindentifikasikan pempimpin potensial. Ketika ditanya oleh seorang wartawan bagaimana ia telah berhasil mempekerjakan 43 orang jutawan, Carnagie menjawab bahwa mereka belum menjadi jutawan ketika mulai bekerja untuknya. Mereka menjadi jutawan ketika mulai bekerja untuknya. Selanjutnya wartawan itu ingin mengetahui bagaimana ia telah mengembangkan orang-orang ini menjadi pemimpin yang sangat bernilai. Carnagie menjawab, manusia dikembangkan dengan cara yang sama seperti orang menambang emas. Sekian ton tanah harus dibuang untuk mendapatkan satu ons emas. Ia menambahkan: " Anda pergi ke tambang emas untuk mencari emas." Itulah tepatnya cara mengembangkan orang yang positif dan sukses. Carilah emas, bukan tanah; yang baik, bukan yang buruk. Semakin positif karakter yang Anda cari, semakin banyak yang Anda temukan.
John Maxwell
Dale Carnagie seorang pakar dalam hal mengindentifikasikan pempimpin potensial. Ketika ditanya oleh seorang wartawan bagaimana ia telah berhasil mempekerjakan 43 orang jutawan, Carnagie menjawab bahwa mereka belum menjadi jutawan ketika mulai bekerja untuknya. Mereka menjadi jutawan ketika mulai bekerja untuknya. Selanjutnya wartawan itu ingin mengetahui bagaimana ia telah mengembangkan orang-orang ini menjadi pemimpin yang sangat bernilai. Carnagie menjawab, manusia dikembangkan dengan cara yang sama seperti orang menambang emas. Sekian ton tanah harus dibuang untuk mendapatkan satu ons emas. Ia menambahkan: " Anda pergi ke tambang emas untuk mencari emas." Itulah tepatnya cara mengembangkan orang yang positif dan sukses. Carilah emas, bukan tanah; yang baik, bukan yang buruk. Semakin positif karakter yang Anda cari, semakin banyak yang Anda temukan.
John Maxwell
Rabu, 03 Agustus 2011
Corporate Hindrances to Revival
By G. Richard Blackaby
Today's churches are praying for revival in unprecedented numbers. They are holding "revival meetings" and "renewal conferences" in the hope that these will hasten the coming of God's Spirit in power. Yet, despite these sincere efforts, many churches have allowed unbiblical theology, as well as secular practices, to become entrenched into their corporate lives. Thus, they impede the very work of God for which they are praying. Many practices have been accepted uncritically into the churches and are dulling members, rather than sensitizing them, to God's voice. The following are some corporate hindrances to revival.
Misleading Terminology
A movement of God among His people is characterized by a profound awareness of sin. Repentance of sin and revival are inseparable.
In many churches, however, sinful practices are being renamed and reclassified. Adultery is a sin that is clearly identified and condemned in Scripture. Yet when a church member commits adultery, it is often said euphemistically that he or she "fell into an affair." The sinner may be portrayed as the victim of an overwhelming schedule, or an unsympathetic spouse. Terminology, such as "falling into" and "affair" subtly shifts the blame away from the sinner. Rather than hiding behind less offensive terms, Christians must be encouraged to confess their sins and accept responsibility for them.
Another adjustment in terminology is to reclassify sin as a "weakness," "bad habit," or an "addiction." Rather than committing the sin of lust, the sinner is said to have an "addiction" to pornography. However addictive and enslaving habitual sin can become, its roots still lie in sin. Society commiserates with an addict; God judges sin. An addict engenders sympathy for his or her condition, whereas the Christian community knows that sin is not to be tolerated. Society encourages addicts to seek therapy, but not necessarily to repent of sin.
By allowing worldly definitions for sin to creep into the church's vocabulary, churches inadvertently desensitize their people to the heinous reality of sin in their midst and the crucial need for repentance. If churches do not clearly identify sin for what it is, their people cannot properly respond to their condition.
Misdirected Appeals
Churches can also unwittingly challenge people in an unbiblical manner. Churches often extend altar calls wherein people who have not been walking in obedient fellowship with God are invited to "rededicate" their lives to God and to His will. In this process, people may come before the church and acknowledge that they have disobeyed God's will. They will affirm their desire to dedicate themselves afresh to obey God. Often, members of the congregation will be invited to come and encourage the one who has expressed his intent to try harder to obey God.
The problem with this is that it is not biblical. The crux of the gospel message is not a call to rededication, but a call to repentance. John the Baptist preached repentance (Matt. 3:2). Jesus preached repentance, both in His earthly ministry and as the resurrected Lord (Matt. 4:17; Rev. 3:19). If one's previous commitment did not keep him walking in obedience, a re-commitment is no more likely to make him faithful. The proper response to disobedience is not a commitment to try harder, but brokenness and repentance for rejecting the will of Almighty God. God looks for surrender to His will,
not commitment to carry it out. Rather than asking church members to repeatedly promise to try harder, churches must call their people to repent before Holy God.
Mistaken Compassion
Many church members are uncomfortable with spiritual brokenness and repentance. When the Holy Spirit works in peoples' lives, convicting them of their sin, churches often do not know how to respond. We are uncomfortable with the tears and anguish of a sinner under conviction by the Spirit. Rather than allowing people to respond to what God is telling them, we often seek to immediately intervene. We try to comfort one whom God is making uncomfortable!
Misplaced Priorities
The structure of a worship service can mitigate against the Spirit's working. Pressure to end the service "on time" can leave little opportunity for people to respond to what God has said to them. Bringing the service abruptly to a close in order to announce the upcoming potluck dinner or church council meeting, can utterly quench the work that God began in the service. If worshippers are quickly ushered out of the auditorium to make room for another service, they are left with little time to process the awesome Word they just received from their Lord. The reality of many larger churches with multiple services is that they must follow a demanding schedule. Live telecasts of services on radio or television can allow media concerns rather than spiritual concerns to be the driving force of the worship service. The danger is that a mighty moving of God in the church may not "fit in" to the printed order of service!
Misunderstood Terms
Many churches fail to properly understand revival terminology. The term "revival" is the returning of God's people to Him. This means their hearts are cleansed and sensitized to God.
Revival does not refer to bringing unregenerate people to salvation. Contemporary "revival" services most often embrace an evangelistic theme. If several people respond to God for salvation, the church concludes that it had a successful "revival." Of course, any time a person experiences salvation a church should rejoice. Revival, however, is for God's people. Preaching evangelistic messages will not necessarily revive Christians who have become spiritually lethargic. Rather, spiritually deadened Christians will conclude that, since they are already converted, the revival meetings have no relevance for them.
The term "repentance" is also greatly misunderstood. It is often seen as a negative term in an age where everything is expected to appear positive. Yet repentance is one of the most positive words in the Christian vocabulary! It refers to turning from a destructive path and moving instead into God's abundant life.
Too often, churches spurn the terminology of repentance, preferring instead to speak of God's love and forgiveness. God's love and forgiveness, however, can only be fully experienced on the basis of the sinner's repentance. Churches that misuse these terms may hinder their people from experiencing true forgiveness and true revival.
Misdiagnosis
The temptation for churches is to deal with symptoms rather than causes. Instead of addressing the condition of people's hearts, churches attempt to change their behavior. If members are not attending particular programs or services, churches try to make these programs and services more appealing. If
members are not sharing their faith with unbelievers, classes in evangelism are offered. If needs are going unmet in the church, ministerial staff is hired to meet these needs.
Yes, it is important that services and programs be carefully designed, but we must look past people's behavior to the heart condition behind it. Rather than focusing on symptoms, God's people must be challenged to examine their love for God. People who truly love God will willingly serve Him, excitedly tell others about Him, and long to worship Him (John 14:15).
Misguided Relationships
Matthew 5:23-24 indicates that Christians are obligated to be reconciled to anyone with whom they have a conflict. Yet in many churches this is not practiced. Church leaders are allowed to feud with one another and yet continue in ecclesiastical leadership. Entire churches refuse to forgive splinter groups, mission churches, or former pastors and yet they presume God will bless them.
Churches have a corporate responsibility to seek reconciliation, just as individuals have been commanded to do so. If the church as a whole refuses to forgive, its members will also find it excusable to harbor bitterness toward others. If a church will corporately repent of unforgiveness toward another church or toward another person, it's members will be freed to be wholly reconciled with God in revival.
There are many subtle attitudes, practices, and theological presuppositions which can hinder a church from experiencing revival. If these are properly dealt with, a church will be in a position to experience the mighty moving of God.
G. Richard Blackaby has been President of Canadian Southern Baptist Seminary in Alberta, Canada since 1993. Prior to this, he served as the senior pastor at Friendship Baptist Church in Winnipeg, Manitoba. He recently co-authored with his father a daily devotional entitled Experiencing God Day by Day.
By G. Richard Blackaby
Today's churches are praying for revival in unprecedented numbers. They are holding "revival meetings" and "renewal conferences" in the hope that these will hasten the coming of God's Spirit in power. Yet, despite these sincere efforts, many churches have allowed unbiblical theology, as well as secular practices, to become entrenched into their corporate lives. Thus, they impede the very work of God for which they are praying. Many practices have been accepted uncritically into the churches and are dulling members, rather than sensitizing them, to God's voice. The following are some corporate hindrances to revival.
Misleading Terminology
A movement of God among His people is characterized by a profound awareness of sin. Repentance of sin and revival are inseparable.
In many churches, however, sinful practices are being renamed and reclassified. Adultery is a sin that is clearly identified and condemned in Scripture. Yet when a church member commits adultery, it is often said euphemistically that he or she "fell into an affair." The sinner may be portrayed as the victim of an overwhelming schedule, or an unsympathetic spouse. Terminology, such as "falling into" and "affair" subtly shifts the blame away from the sinner. Rather than hiding behind less offensive terms, Christians must be encouraged to confess their sins and accept responsibility for them.
Another adjustment in terminology is to reclassify sin as a "weakness," "bad habit," or an "addiction." Rather than committing the sin of lust, the sinner is said to have an "addiction" to pornography. However addictive and enslaving habitual sin can become, its roots still lie in sin. Society commiserates with an addict; God judges sin. An addict engenders sympathy for his or her condition, whereas the Christian community knows that sin is not to be tolerated. Society encourages addicts to seek therapy, but not necessarily to repent of sin.
By allowing worldly definitions for sin to creep into the church's vocabulary, churches inadvertently desensitize their people to the heinous reality of sin in their midst and the crucial need for repentance. If churches do not clearly identify sin for what it is, their people cannot properly respond to their condition.
Misdirected Appeals
Churches can also unwittingly challenge people in an unbiblical manner. Churches often extend altar calls wherein people who have not been walking in obedient fellowship with God are invited to "rededicate" their lives to God and to His will. In this process, people may come before the church and acknowledge that they have disobeyed God's will. They will affirm their desire to dedicate themselves afresh to obey God. Often, members of the congregation will be invited to come and encourage the one who has expressed his intent to try harder to obey God.
The problem with this is that it is not biblical. The crux of the gospel message is not a call to rededication, but a call to repentance. John the Baptist preached repentance (Matt. 3:2). Jesus preached repentance, both in His earthly ministry and as the resurrected Lord (Matt. 4:17; Rev. 3:19). If one's previous commitment did not keep him walking in obedience, a re-commitment is no more likely to make him faithful. The proper response to disobedience is not a commitment to try harder, but brokenness and repentance for rejecting the will of Almighty God. God looks for surrender to His will,
not commitment to carry it out. Rather than asking church members to repeatedly promise to try harder, churches must call their people to repent before Holy God.
Mistaken Compassion
Many church members are uncomfortable with spiritual brokenness and repentance. When the Holy Spirit works in peoples' lives, convicting them of their sin, churches often do not know how to respond. We are uncomfortable with the tears and anguish of a sinner under conviction by the Spirit. Rather than allowing people to respond to what God is telling them, we often seek to immediately intervene. We try to comfort one whom God is making uncomfortable!
Misplaced Priorities
The structure of a worship service can mitigate against the Spirit's working. Pressure to end the service "on time" can leave little opportunity for people to respond to what God has said to them. Bringing the service abruptly to a close in order to announce the upcoming potluck dinner or church council meeting, can utterly quench the work that God began in the service. If worshippers are quickly ushered out of the auditorium to make room for another service, they are left with little time to process the awesome Word they just received from their Lord. The reality of many larger churches with multiple services is that they must follow a demanding schedule. Live telecasts of services on radio or television can allow media concerns rather than spiritual concerns to be the driving force of the worship service. The danger is that a mighty moving of God in the church may not "fit in" to the printed order of service!
Misunderstood Terms
Many churches fail to properly understand revival terminology. The term "revival" is the returning of God's people to Him. This means their hearts are cleansed and sensitized to God.
Revival does not refer to bringing unregenerate people to salvation. Contemporary "revival" services most often embrace an evangelistic theme. If several people respond to God for salvation, the church concludes that it had a successful "revival." Of course, any time a person experiences salvation a church should rejoice. Revival, however, is for God's people. Preaching evangelistic messages will not necessarily revive Christians who have become spiritually lethargic. Rather, spiritually deadened Christians will conclude that, since they are already converted, the revival meetings have no relevance for them.
The term "repentance" is also greatly misunderstood. It is often seen as a negative term in an age where everything is expected to appear positive. Yet repentance is one of the most positive words in the Christian vocabulary! It refers to turning from a destructive path and moving instead into God's abundant life.
Too often, churches spurn the terminology of repentance, preferring instead to speak of God's love and forgiveness. God's love and forgiveness, however, can only be fully experienced on the basis of the sinner's repentance. Churches that misuse these terms may hinder their people from experiencing true forgiveness and true revival.
Misdiagnosis
The temptation for churches is to deal with symptoms rather than causes. Instead of addressing the condition of people's hearts, churches attempt to change their behavior. If members are not attending particular programs or services, churches try to make these programs and services more appealing. If
members are not sharing their faith with unbelievers, classes in evangelism are offered. If needs are going unmet in the church, ministerial staff is hired to meet these needs.
Yes, it is important that services and programs be carefully designed, but we must look past people's behavior to the heart condition behind it. Rather than focusing on symptoms, God's people must be challenged to examine their love for God. People who truly love God will willingly serve Him, excitedly tell others about Him, and long to worship Him (John 14:15).
Misguided Relationships
Matthew 5:23-24 indicates that Christians are obligated to be reconciled to anyone with whom they have a conflict. Yet in many churches this is not practiced. Church leaders are allowed to feud with one another and yet continue in ecclesiastical leadership. Entire churches refuse to forgive splinter groups, mission churches, or former pastors and yet they presume God will bless them.
Churches have a corporate responsibility to seek reconciliation, just as individuals have been commanded to do so. If the church as a whole refuses to forgive, its members will also find it excusable to harbor bitterness toward others. If a church will corporately repent of unforgiveness toward another church or toward another person, it's members will be freed to be wholly reconciled with God in revival.
There are many subtle attitudes, practices, and theological presuppositions which can hinder a church from experiencing revival. If these are properly dealt with, a church will be in a position to experience the mighty moving of God.
G. Richard Blackaby has been President of Canadian Southern Baptist Seminary in Alberta, Canada since 1993. Prior to this, he served as the senior pastor at Friendship Baptist Church in Winnipeg, Manitoba. He recently co-authored with his father a daily devotional entitled Experiencing God Day by Day.
Senin, 18 Juli 2011
Tujuh hal yang harus diingat oleh Istri tentang sex
Apakah yang seorang Istri harus ingat tentang sex.
1. Sex adalah ide dari Tuhan sendiri. Tuhan memberikan itu kepada suami dan istri dalam lingkup pernikahan. Itu adalah bagian dari rencana Tuhan, dalam suatu pernikahan.
2. Bagi Suami, sex adalah urusan yang penting – ini bukan berarti atau tanda bahwa suami adalah orang yang tidak rohani . Tuhan menginginkan Suami dan Istri dapat menikmati keintiman sexual.
3. Apakah respon yang Anda berikan ketika Suami menghendaki hubungan sex ? Tidak tertarik dapat anda perlihatkan dengan rasa tidak hormat dan kurang menghargai dia. Ini tidak berarti bahwa Istri harus mengatakan “ya” setiap kali suami menghendaki hubungan sex. Tetapi ketika Istri mengatakan “tidak” maka ia harus memberikan penjelasan dan alasan yang baik dan benar dengan Istri tetap meyakinkan suami bahwa ia masih menginginkan dia.
4. Sex adalah suatu disiplin dalam pernikahan. Itu adalah bagian dimana suami dan istri saling melayani. Adalah hal yang salah jika Istri menggunakan sex sebagai hadiah (reward) kepada suami atau tidak melakukan hubungan sex sebagai hukuman ( punishment ) kepada suami. Alkitab dengan jelas bahwa suami dan istri tidak boleh saling menjauhi dalam area ini ( 1 Kor 7:5 )
5. Laki-laki berorientasi dengan apa yang dilihat. Kegairahan sexualnya dipicu melalui penglihatannya. Tidak peduli bagaimana anda melihat diri anda sendiri, suami anda tertarik melalui apa yang dilihatnya. Allah telah menciptakan laki-laki dengan keinginan untuk melihat seorang wanita dalam keadaan telanjang. Dan satu-satunya cara untuk memuaskan hasrat tersebut adalah seorang suami melihat istrinya, dan bukan wanita lain.
6. Romantisme seorang pria seperti yang digambarkan dalam novel atau “opera sabun” adalah di lebih-lebihkan. Kuat, sensitive, sangat peduli, seperti yang digambarkan dalam novel adalah sebatas karakter fiksi. Tidak ada seorang suami yang dapat meniru apa yang digambarkan oleh pengarang novel tersebut.
7. Kreatifitas adalah sesuatu yang baik. Di dalam Alkitab tidak disebutkan secara khusus bagaimana suami – istri melakukan hubungan sex. Itu berarti Suami – Istri diberi ”kebebasan” secara wajar untuk menemukan kenikmatan dalam keintiman mereka melakukan hubungan sex dalam perkawinan. Dengan memperhatikan kenyamanan dan tanpa tekanan atau paksaan dari salah satu pihak. Kegairahan dapat mendorong berbagai kreatifitas dan variasi dalam hubungan pernikahan
1. Sex adalah ide dari Tuhan sendiri. Tuhan memberikan itu kepada suami dan istri dalam lingkup pernikahan. Itu adalah bagian dari rencana Tuhan, dalam suatu pernikahan.
2. Bagi Suami, sex adalah urusan yang penting – ini bukan berarti atau tanda bahwa suami adalah orang yang tidak rohani . Tuhan menginginkan Suami dan Istri dapat menikmati keintiman sexual.
3. Apakah respon yang Anda berikan ketika Suami menghendaki hubungan sex ? Tidak tertarik dapat anda perlihatkan dengan rasa tidak hormat dan kurang menghargai dia. Ini tidak berarti bahwa Istri harus mengatakan “ya” setiap kali suami menghendaki hubungan sex. Tetapi ketika Istri mengatakan “tidak” maka ia harus memberikan penjelasan dan alasan yang baik dan benar dengan Istri tetap meyakinkan suami bahwa ia masih menginginkan dia.
4. Sex adalah suatu disiplin dalam pernikahan. Itu adalah bagian dimana suami dan istri saling melayani. Adalah hal yang salah jika Istri menggunakan sex sebagai hadiah (reward) kepada suami atau tidak melakukan hubungan sex sebagai hukuman ( punishment ) kepada suami. Alkitab dengan jelas bahwa suami dan istri tidak boleh saling menjauhi dalam area ini ( 1 Kor 7:5 )
5. Laki-laki berorientasi dengan apa yang dilihat. Kegairahan sexualnya dipicu melalui penglihatannya. Tidak peduli bagaimana anda melihat diri anda sendiri, suami anda tertarik melalui apa yang dilihatnya. Allah telah menciptakan laki-laki dengan keinginan untuk melihat seorang wanita dalam keadaan telanjang. Dan satu-satunya cara untuk memuaskan hasrat tersebut adalah seorang suami melihat istrinya, dan bukan wanita lain.
6. Romantisme seorang pria seperti yang digambarkan dalam novel atau “opera sabun” adalah di lebih-lebihkan. Kuat, sensitive, sangat peduli, seperti yang digambarkan dalam novel adalah sebatas karakter fiksi. Tidak ada seorang suami yang dapat meniru apa yang digambarkan oleh pengarang novel tersebut.
7. Kreatifitas adalah sesuatu yang baik. Di dalam Alkitab tidak disebutkan secara khusus bagaimana suami – istri melakukan hubungan sex. Itu berarti Suami – Istri diberi ”kebebasan” secara wajar untuk menemukan kenikmatan dalam keintiman mereka melakukan hubungan sex dalam perkawinan. Dengan memperhatikan kenyamanan dan tanpa tekanan atau paksaan dari salah satu pihak. Kegairahan dapat mendorong berbagai kreatifitas dan variasi dalam hubungan pernikahan
Tujuh hal yang harus Suami ingat tentang sex
Apakah yang harus Suami ingat tentang sex
1. Sex dan romantisme yang ada dalam film merupakan sesuatu yang dilebih-lebih kan. Janganlah mengukur dan atau meniru hubungan sex dan romantisme anda, dengan apa yang ada di film.
2. Sex mungkin pada sebagian wanita ( meskipun tidak selalu demikian ) bagi istri anda mungkin adalah prioritas yang lebih rendah dibanding dengan suami.
- Apakah anda memenuhi keinginan terbesar dari istri anda, seperti anda ingin dipenuhi keinginan anda tentang sex.
- Dapatkah anda menyebutkan 3 keinginan yang besar dalam diri istri anda tentang hubungan.
3. Istri anda menginginkan hubungan yang aman dan harmonis. Ia harus mengetahui bahwa anda menginginkan dia dengan sepenuh hati (hati, pikiran dan tubuh ). Ia harus yakin bahwa anda ada disana karena dia, dan dia adalah satu-satunya yang anda inginkan.
4. Istri anda menginginkan hubungan sex yang disebabkan karena anda mempunyai hubungan yang erat, bukan hanya sekedar tahu saja.
a. Harus menyediakan waktu untuk bersama-sama dengan istri dalam berbagai aktivitas; bercanda.
b. Kalau tidak ada kebersamaan maka ia akan kehilangan motivasi untuk melakukan hubungan sex.
5. Istri anda menginginkan suaminya adalah orang yang setia, ia tidak senang jika suaminya melakukan perzinahan. Pornograpi merupakan fantasi yang dipandang sebagai perzinahan.
6. Tidak ada formula rahasia untuk membangkitkan kegairahan sexual istri. Jika anda berfikir telah menemukan formula rahasia itu, dan anda mengulang formula tersebut maka ia akan mengubah formulanya. Ia tidak ingin dimanipulasi.
7. Istri anda sering tidak merasa aman tentang kecantikannya. Ia mengetahui segala kekurangannya. Apakah yang anda katakan tentang hal itu ? Dia perlu diyakinkan bahwa Anda senantiasa mencintainya dan mengaguminya.
1. Sex dan romantisme yang ada dalam film merupakan sesuatu yang dilebih-lebih kan. Janganlah mengukur dan atau meniru hubungan sex dan romantisme anda, dengan apa yang ada di film.
2. Sex mungkin pada sebagian wanita ( meskipun tidak selalu demikian ) bagi istri anda mungkin adalah prioritas yang lebih rendah dibanding dengan suami.
- Apakah anda memenuhi keinginan terbesar dari istri anda, seperti anda ingin dipenuhi keinginan anda tentang sex.
- Dapatkah anda menyebutkan 3 keinginan yang besar dalam diri istri anda tentang hubungan.
3. Istri anda menginginkan hubungan yang aman dan harmonis. Ia harus mengetahui bahwa anda menginginkan dia dengan sepenuh hati (hati, pikiran dan tubuh ). Ia harus yakin bahwa anda ada disana karena dia, dan dia adalah satu-satunya yang anda inginkan.
4. Istri anda menginginkan hubungan sex yang disebabkan karena anda mempunyai hubungan yang erat, bukan hanya sekedar tahu saja.
a. Harus menyediakan waktu untuk bersama-sama dengan istri dalam berbagai aktivitas; bercanda.
b. Kalau tidak ada kebersamaan maka ia akan kehilangan motivasi untuk melakukan hubungan sex.
5. Istri anda menginginkan suaminya adalah orang yang setia, ia tidak senang jika suaminya melakukan perzinahan. Pornograpi merupakan fantasi yang dipandang sebagai perzinahan.
6. Tidak ada formula rahasia untuk membangkitkan kegairahan sexual istri. Jika anda berfikir telah menemukan formula rahasia itu, dan anda mengulang formula tersebut maka ia akan mengubah formulanya. Ia tidak ingin dimanipulasi.
7. Istri anda sering tidak merasa aman tentang kecantikannya. Ia mengetahui segala kekurangannya. Apakah yang anda katakan tentang hal itu ? Dia perlu diyakinkan bahwa Anda senantiasa mencintainya dan mengaguminya.
Kamis, 07 Juli 2011
Our Intimacy WIth GOd
Our intimacy with God
Charles F. Stanley
Scripture: Psalm 63:1-8
I. Introduction: Do you have an intimate connection with God? The Father designed us with the emotional and spiritual capacity to have a loving, personal relationship with Him.
King David knew how to have an intimate relationship with the Lord. Although he was far from perfect, David had learned that only the Father's love could satisfy his heart's deepest longings (Ps. 63:3). The king passionately sought God through prayer, repentance, and obedience. From his example, you and I can learn how to enjoy closeness with the Father.
II. Man's Relationship with God
A. Direct. The Lord is the ultimate authority over each and every person's life—even those who refuse to acknowledge His sovereignty.
B. Distinct. If you have trusted in Jesus' death on the cross to pay for your sin-debt, you've become one of God's children and have a unique relationship with Him.
C. Distant. Sometimes God's children allow their relationship with Him to suffer. They may attend church, but might not read their Bibles faithfully or know how to relate to the Lord in prayer. As a result, they excuse sin in their lives and don't have a sense of oneness with Him.
D. Developing. Some believers passionately pursue relationship with the Father on a continual, daily basis—regardless of life's circumstances.
III. Requirements for an Intimate Relationship with God
A. A Spiritual Focus. For most people, the word "intimacy" is associated primarily with sexuality. But genuine fellowship with God involves relating to Him on an emotional and spiritual level rather than a physical one.
B. Personal Involvement. The Lord created humans in His image so that all people could relate to Him on an individual basis. The Holy Spirit lives within every believer, giving each one the ability to develop a personal friendship with Christ.
C. Trust. Intimacy cannot exist without trust. If you and I refuse to surrender to and obey God, we can't expect to have an intimate relationship with Him.
D. Love. Oneness with God must be motivated out of love, not duty. Remember that God forgave you on the basis of Christ's death on the cross. You don't have to earn His affection. Let that fact motivate you to freely and genuinely devote yourself to knowing Him better.
E. Openness and Transparency. Confess specific sins and shortcomings to the Lord. Be honest with Him, and intimacy will grow.
F. Two-way Communication. Ask the Father to show you how to hear His guidance for your life, and set aside time to listen to Him.
G. Time and Effort. You must devote yourself to knowing the Lord if you want to experience the fullness of friendship with Him.
IV. Benefits of Intimacy with the Father
A. Stability. In the midst of life's storms, a solid relationship with God is your anchor.
B. Security. You can have the assurance that He is always with you, ready to help in any situation or circumstance.
C. Serenity. Intimacy gives you quietness and peace in your spirit, no matter what happens. You can trust that the Lord will guide you through difficulty.
D. Sensitivity. God will give you greater spiritual understanding and increased awareness to the needs of others. .
V. Barriers to Intimacy
A. Pride. Some put their trust in themselves and pursue relationships, accomplishments, or possessions instead of a relationship with the Father.
B. Rebellion. When we deliberately disobey the Lord, we cannot have intimacy with Him.
C. Hurry. Some people never find intimacy with God because they are always impatient.
VI. Conclusion: I pray your relationship with God is characterized by unity, surrender, and joy. But if you aren't experiencing intimacy with the Lord, He desires to reveal Himself in a personal way to you. Let go of pride, confess your sin and rebellion, and devote yourself to a relationship with Him. David wrote, "In Your presence is fullness of joy; in Your right hand there are pleasures forever" (Ps. 16:11). Only God can satisfy the deepest longings of your heart. Take time to discover the awesome depth of the Father's love through an intimate relationship with Him.
Charles F. Stanley
Scripture: Psalm 63:1-8
I. Introduction: Do you have an intimate connection with God? The Father designed us with the emotional and spiritual capacity to have a loving, personal relationship with Him.
King David knew how to have an intimate relationship with the Lord. Although he was far from perfect, David had learned that only the Father's love could satisfy his heart's deepest longings (Ps. 63:3). The king passionately sought God through prayer, repentance, and obedience. From his example, you and I can learn how to enjoy closeness with the Father.
II. Man's Relationship with God
A. Direct. The Lord is the ultimate authority over each and every person's life—even those who refuse to acknowledge His sovereignty.
B. Distinct. If you have trusted in Jesus' death on the cross to pay for your sin-debt, you've become one of God's children and have a unique relationship with Him.
C. Distant. Sometimes God's children allow their relationship with Him to suffer. They may attend church, but might not read their Bibles faithfully or know how to relate to the Lord in prayer. As a result, they excuse sin in their lives and don't have a sense of oneness with Him.
D. Developing. Some believers passionately pursue relationship with the Father on a continual, daily basis—regardless of life's circumstances.
III. Requirements for an Intimate Relationship with God
A. A Spiritual Focus. For most people, the word "intimacy" is associated primarily with sexuality. But genuine fellowship with God involves relating to Him on an emotional and spiritual level rather than a physical one.
B. Personal Involvement. The Lord created humans in His image so that all people could relate to Him on an individual basis. The Holy Spirit lives within every believer, giving each one the ability to develop a personal friendship with Christ.
C. Trust. Intimacy cannot exist without trust. If you and I refuse to surrender to and obey God, we can't expect to have an intimate relationship with Him.
D. Love. Oneness with God must be motivated out of love, not duty. Remember that God forgave you on the basis of Christ's death on the cross. You don't have to earn His affection. Let that fact motivate you to freely and genuinely devote yourself to knowing Him better.
E. Openness and Transparency. Confess specific sins and shortcomings to the Lord. Be honest with Him, and intimacy will grow.
F. Two-way Communication. Ask the Father to show you how to hear His guidance for your life, and set aside time to listen to Him.
G. Time and Effort. You must devote yourself to knowing the Lord if you want to experience the fullness of friendship with Him.
IV. Benefits of Intimacy with the Father
A. Stability. In the midst of life's storms, a solid relationship with God is your anchor.
B. Security. You can have the assurance that He is always with you, ready to help in any situation or circumstance.
C. Serenity. Intimacy gives you quietness and peace in your spirit, no matter what happens. You can trust that the Lord will guide you through difficulty.
D. Sensitivity. God will give you greater spiritual understanding and increased awareness to the needs of others. .
V. Barriers to Intimacy
A. Pride. Some put their trust in themselves and pursue relationships, accomplishments, or possessions instead of a relationship with the Father.
B. Rebellion. When we deliberately disobey the Lord, we cannot have intimacy with Him.
C. Hurry. Some people never find intimacy with God because they are always impatient.
VI. Conclusion: I pray your relationship with God is characterized by unity, surrender, and joy. But if you aren't experiencing intimacy with the Lord, He desires to reveal Himself in a personal way to you. Let go of pride, confess your sin and rebellion, and devote yourself to a relationship with Him. David wrote, "In Your presence is fullness of joy; in Your right hand there are pleasures forever" (Ps. 16:11). Only God can satisfy the deepest longings of your heart. Take time to discover the awesome depth of the Father's love through an intimate relationship with Him.
Sabtu, 14 Mei 2011
Menjadi nomor satu ?
Jangan berlomba untuk menjadi pusat perhatian, kita perlu menerima peran kita dalam bayang-bayang. Jangan meninggikan diri. Jangan mendorong diri anda ke depan. Biarkan orang lain yang melakukan. Yang lebih baik, biarkan Allah yang melakukannya.
Jika kita hebat, percayalah, dunia akan tahu. Kita akan ditemukan.... dalam waktu Allah. Jika kita penting untuk rencanaNya, Allah akan menempatkan kita di tempat yang tepat pada saat yang tepat juga.
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